Combining Homes: How to Merge Your Lives and Styles After the Wedding

The key here is planning and cooperation. Don’t make rash decisions or make any calls without consulting your husband or wife. After all, this is a deeply personal process — and you need to treat it as such.

Decluttering Before Combining Homes

Have you figured out which few items you can’t live without? Great! Now it’s time to start thinking about everything else.

Keep in mind that the point here isn’t to jam everything both of you own under one roof. It’s unrealistic, and even if you’ve got the space — it’s bound to be ugly. So, your goal should be to find items that are complimentary with one another and create a unified, logical space out of each room.

First, you need to consider whether your vibe matches your partner’s. If you’re into modern minimalism and they like a cozy cottage aesthetic, both of you will have to decide on something in between.

When that’s done, you’ll have to start decluttering. In other words, it means getting rid of all unnecessary items. In most cases, these won’t be things you were ready to throw away — like old magazines. That’s an easy choice. But what do you do when both of you own a perfectly good coffee maker?

As you can see, it’ll take hundreds of micro-decisions before you know what’s not making it into your new home. But look at it this way — this is all a process of creating a new place that’s home for both of you, equally. You can probably donate, sell, or toss out most of the stuff you don’t need. And if you and your partner really can’t part with a bunch of your stuff, consider renting storage space.

How To Organize Your Common Space

Yep, combining homes takes a lot of work — and even more willingness to compromise. However, with the right mindset and some careful planning, you can create a space that truly celebrates your love for one another.

But once you’ve decluttered your home, one question looms large — if your aesthetic tastes clash too much, how do you create one unified decor?

Naturally, you’ll have to find a shared style. Luckily, you can go on Pinterest and browse styles that suit both of you — and styles that fit into the household items both of you already own.

Chances are you’ll have to make some adjustments to weave everything into one sensible decor, which means buying additional furniture or doing small DIY projects. However, if you’re on a tight budget, keep track of costs — you don’t want to go overboard.

Of course, this will be easier if you’re moving into a new, empty house. If you’re moving into your partner’s home, or vice versa, you’ll have to make a lot of compromises. Or, you can decide to reset the whole place and create a brand new decor — if your partner is okay with that. Try to pitch that idea since it will make it easier for both of you to feel like you are living in a new, shared household. Create Personal NooksCombining homes means relocating together into a new shared space, but it doesn’t mean both of you have to lose your old visual identities. Try to find room for a few personal spaces where you and your partner can have full control of the decor. These spaces can also serve as areas for some much-needed “me time”. Let’s face it, even in the best marriage in the world — all of us need a few moments to ourselves from time to time. And these personal spaces don’t have to take up entire rooms. Depending on your favorite activities and items, it can be as small as a single desk space. Divvying Up Chores Many people think that combining homes only means crafting the perfect decor. Actually, your home is more than that — it’s also the shared experience of living in the household. And unfortunately, that sometimes means doing chores. Like most things, the best way to handle chores is to share them equally and fairly. Take a few minutes to sit down with your spouse and make a plan of household tasks. Differentiate between those you do on a monthly, weekly, and daily basis. Then, start discussing who wants to tackle what. Ideally, you’ll find something you don’t mind doing that your spouse hates — always keep dislikes in mind. Of course, there will be some chores neither of you want to do. In that case, create an alternating schedule. To make all of this easier, consider making a chore chart to quickly track the tasks both of you are supposed to handle. Wrapping UpAt the end of the day, combining homes is a joyous process if you communicate openly and do it right. When both of you want to please each other and make a gorgeous new family home where everyone feels great — it’ll go smoothly. To ensure your spouse is happy with your new arrangements, check in regularly during the next few weeks. See if anything needs to be rethought or changed on time. If there are any misunderstandings or misgivings about your ideas, try to foster open communication about them. This is the only way you’ll reach a sensible compromise. And as you’ll learn sooner or later, compromise is the building block of every successful marriage.

POST CONTRIBUTOR: GIANNA VANDEVEER

CLAYTON HOUSE BY WEDGEWOOD WEDDINGS