Planning a wedding can be a couple's most exciting and financially challenging task. It’s easy to get swept up in the desire to have an extravagant wedding that exceeds your budget. Elegant weddings don’t need to be the most expensive, though — you can have a wedding that makes you happy while not breaking the bank.
Distinguishing needs and wants is key to staying on budget while creating a wedding that reflects who you and your partner are and represents your story. Here are some practical strategies to guide you through decision-making and budget-keeping while planning your wedding.
Your wedding should have three main nonnegotiable items — the officiant and wedding certificate costs, guest necessities like food, safety and basic seating, and one must-have item, like a live band or photographer. Nonnegotiable lists vary between couples because they reflect who you are.
For example, an eco-conscious couple may make sustainable decorations or silverware nonnegotiable since weddings produce over 400 pounds of garbage and 63 tons of carbon dioxide. Some couples want a big wedding attended by all their loved ones, while others prefer a secluded ceremony and celebration with only the immediate family.
Ensuring your nonnegotiable's fit into the budget is crucial before adding the rest of your needs and wants. Start by writing down your shared values, such as the type of wedding you want and the most important thing to have at the wedding. Once you define your day, you’ll know what to add to your nonnegotiable list. This list should be the only one you can justify spending more on.
Generally, your venue is the most considerable expense. It should be considered on your nonnegotiable list because it caters to your guests and their safety and will house the most sentimental moments of your day.
Budgeting doesn’t mean you have to limit your joy. A realistic budget can actually make the occasion more joyful since it will save you from spending years paying back loans. Consider budgeting as a means to spend on what matters most. In addition to the nonnegotiable list, consider the date of the wedding and the guest list when establishing your budget. These factors help determine your primary costs.
Next, break your wedding list into categories like venue, food, attire, decor, entertainment, bachelor and bachelorette parties, catering, photography, flowers, stationery, cake, favors and gifts, wedding rings, a wedding planner, and vehicles for the couple to and from the wedding. These categories make up your secondary budget.
Because the venue is generally the most significant expense, exclude the venue cost before deciding how much to spend on each category. Couples usually start wedding planning months before the wedding. If you can save more for a bigger budget, set that aside for the nice-to-have categories.
Calculate your total available funds, including savings, any contributions from loved ones and what you’re comfortable spending without going into debt. Once you’ve established a final budget, calculate how long you have to reach that goal.
To determine how achievable your savings plan is, divide your total savings goal by the number of months you have to save. If the resulting monthly savings amount is unrealistic, it’s best to revisit and adjust your budget early. Set up an automatic transfer from your checking account to your savings account so you meet your budget requirements when it’s time to pay for the wedding expenses.
Use your nonnegotiable's list to decide which categories fall into needs and wants. Here’s how to evaluate the major wedding expenses and separate needs from wants:
You need a space that can accommodate all guests, ensuring their comfort and safety. The venue should include basic amenities like toilets, shelter and electricity. It should be legally permitted for a wedding, and your needs should be accommodated on the day to prevent delays and stress. Your wants for a venue may include waterfront views, a historical estate, a rooftop bar and lounge areas that will increase the venue's price.
You need a professional or trustworthy photographer to capture the priceless moments of your special day. You may also want a second photographer, drone footage, a pre-wedding or engagement shoot, and same-day edits.
Needs include food you’re familiar with, that meets dietary requirements, uses high-quality ingredients and comes in appropriate quantities. Some couples want a tailored menu that matches the theme, tasting sessions and catering services to clean up after the meal.
Consider a buffet instead of plated food if your guest list is long. Plated food is usually more expensive when you’re paying per head, and buffets generally require less staff, so labor costs should decrease.
Both members of the couple need comfortable wedding attire that fits well, aligns with the tone and theme of the wedding, and gives the wearer confidence. You may want designer labels, multiple outfit changes and customized jewelry.
Your needs list should include simple and affordable decor to meet your wedding theme and make the wedding space functional and inviting. Consider the table linens, chairs and basic arrangements. The wants list could include trendy decor, such as elaborate floral installations, custom signage, hanging lanterns and a flower wall.
You need music for the ceremony, reception and dance floor to set the tone and entertain guests. Some couples include a live band, DJ, MC, games to keep guests occupied, and lighting effects in their entertainment “wants.” A budget-friendly option is to create a playlist filled with your and your partner’s favorite songs, top songs of the year, and classic love songs that a reliable DJ can play on a basic sound system.
To create your guest list, start with the people who must be there. This typically includes your immediate family and closest friends who have impacted your life and will assist in the growth of your marriage. After that, consider your wants, including people who knew you as a baby but with whom you no longer have close relations and plus-ones for your guests.
The 24-hour rule helps you avoid making big decisions that impact your future based on emotions or impulse. The rule improves conscious decision-making and communication skills, which are crucial in wedding planning and help you keep an open line of communication and avoid misunderstandings between you and your partner.
Give yourself 24 hours to think about whether you genuinely want to spend the money on an item or service that you don’t need. This will help you rationally decide to decline or find a method to pay the bill. Giving a delayed response also enables you to find alternatives. For example, if you want a specific tablecloth for your wedding, but it’s too expensive, your wedding party could assist in finding more cost-effective materials.
Constantly reevaluate your needs list. As time progresses, you may compromise on some needs to reduce your budget without jeopardizing the big day. For instance, you may decide to find a second-hand reception dress rather than buying something new. Traditional wedding costs have increased by 20% and many modern-day couples choose to thrift wedding decor and attire to stretch their money further.
Be flexible in your wedding attire, stationery, wedding favors and more. It's easy to get caught up in the event and forget its meaning. The day is about celebrating love and commitment between two people in the presence of loved ones. Reminding yourself of this when compromising or being flexible with your needs and wants lists helps to find common ground while holding on to the main goal.
Your special day is about love, not financial burdens or putting on a performance. By separating needs from wants, you’re making a conscious decision to positively reflect your relationship, values and long-term goals.
When you focus on what truly matters — like a meaningful ceremony, good food and time spent with loved ones — you can enjoy a wedding that protects your financial well-being and creates a healthy foundation for your marriage. Make decisions based on clarity to create a day that reflects you and your partner.